Sunday, June 27, 2010

Changing times..

I don't write much. Usually. But then, again, this is no usual occasion. Sometimes, I just wish I had something to hold on to my thoughts, to store for them for a future reference, like a pensieve or something.. Sometimes, I think there are too many random thoughts floating around without any orientation. Well maybe that's how human minds are supposed to work. The thing is, I'm undergoing a change. That's why I wanted to write a blog (and maybe that's why all this sounds so weird). Wait, first, let me say a little about myself, which might make this all a little clearer.
Well, I just finished my graduation in electronics engineering and have joined now for an MBA program. That apart, I'm generally perceived to be a reserved, silent guy who has his own little world. In short, I'm not the one you'd expect to break the ice in a group. And like all such people, I think a lot, about some thing or the other and I enjoy solitude even though I prefer to be with my friends (there's a difference, see). Though I don't think my close friends would agree on the reserved part, but really, I wouldn't know about that, because I never talk about such things. It's all the more difficult for me to define myself, because I'm not what I used to be; I change.
Oh yeah, I do. There was a time, back when I was in school, I used to think of people as being constant, fixed entities, whose behaviour can be explained or predicted, more often than not. That led me to think that there are values and beliefs that are held firm. But then, gradually, as time passed, I could no longer ignore the fact that I was slowly, but continuously, changing. The first of such changes was when I entered higher secondary, where I first had the real taste of friendship. I had some of my best moments in my life there.
But the real major change was after I started my college life. I never really noticed it, till I gave it out as an answer at my IIM-A interview. They were asking me about some things and gradually the talk went into about how I had changed over the years. I told the panel members that moving from a town to a big metro (well, not that big, but still chennai is a metro), and living a hostel had its effect on me and that it changed me. I just said it because it was a logical answer (and it sounded good the way I said it). I never gave much thought about that answer I gave them to seriously believe it, but after some days, I started to think and I saw that this was true. More than I ever expected. Thing is, college was different. After the final two years at school, I thought I couldn't be surprised by anything that college could throw at me, but I was wrong. The life I had in CEG was way different from what I had expected and I must say I didn't quite understand its significance till I had completed a half of my stay there.
I still remember my early days there vividly. But then, that would require me to go into details and I think it's best left for another post. Continuing on the subject, I think it was into my third year that I realized how grateful and lucky I was to be in such a place. The campus of Anna university seemed more beautiful than ever before. But even then, no I didn't realize its effect on me. It was well into my final year, towards the end, and after having thoughts about future and stuff about leaving college that I finally I realized I was right and I saw how much I had changed over the years.
I wish I had recognized all that in the first two years itself, but that's okay. Everything happens for a reason, right? The change in the surroundings from a town to a metro is enough to change anyone I guess. The very people you meet, the kind of places you visit, and in the very surroundings around you, lie the factors that shape your life. And sooner or later, you come to realize that fact. In my case it was the latter. Anyway, that was about college and then for a while I was really clueless as to what I'd be doing next. Not that there were a lack of options, but I really didn't know what I wanted to do in life. (Well, to be fair, I still don't but hey, I'm here, and that's a start.)
And then, finally joined for a post graduate programme for MBA and so, two more years of hostel life. It's just been over a week now since that happened. I just had my freshers' welcome party here. And thinking about it, the experience I've had here is again part of that ever happening change I talked about. A new state, a new language and a new environment -- it's all just exciting. I've just come back from the party and experienced the unique joka culture and I feel that sense of belonging that one associates with a place already setting in. I feel as if something is in store just around the corner. That change, that I keep talking about - it's happening right now even as I write this... And this blog is nothing but a mere effect of that. I'm looking forward to post here about the things that I see, stuff I think about and so on..

P.S.: So this, is my first sincere attempt at blogging and I hope I do keep posting regularly..

"Change is nature. The part that we can influence. And it starts when we decide.."


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  3. "... but I really didn't know what I wanted to do in life. (Well, to be fair, I still don't but hey, I'm here, and that's a start.)..."

    That's pretty honest!

    I'm happy for you... Best wishes,
    Ravi Shankar

  4. I don't know if you read books or if you have already read this book that I am gonna tell you... But you should really read The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand... You will get a different perspective... with this whole topic

  5. Thanks everyone.. And about The Fountainhead, nope.. I've heard it's good but haven't read it yet.. Will try it..

  6. I never thought tat u hav tis much abilit in writin(wel, i kno u r too smart in other field but it's little surprise). I 'liked' it days befor(in buzz) withou reading (it's not tat i don belie in ur writi), but it's somethin i often do. Never mind..
    Anyway, It's too gud. The concept of 'change' whic u decided to writ s gud and de way u put it s too gud.
    I expect tat u'l explore or put up wat ur thoughts are. May b i'm one in ur frnd circle, stil i lik to kno wat u really are.
    Write more, wen u come up with differen thoughts.

  7. well, vivek, i believ i alread told u about 'The Fountainhead'. But better u follow ur own way of thinkin. Also, my request is to read tat book, which is very different frm books u normally read. I also recomment 'Atlas Shrugged' by de same author. It'l b a great experince for u and to al de ppl who read it.

  8. yeah.. thanks.. I'll try those..

  9. Hey Vivek, Though I am reading this Blog pretty late but I must accept that this is one of the best pieces of writings I have read till date.. Really the way u carried u'r topic and the way u expressed u'r perspective was really nice. I thoroughly enjoyed this blog.. Do write more..